Christmas Cheer Clothing...

So I once lived with a girl named Shanna who, every Christmas, would wear Christmas colors every day after Thanksgiving until Christmas. This year I decided to give it a try. Although I admit I am getting terribly sick of wearing the same colors every day, it's been a good reminder of the Christmas season.


Outfit #1: Nija Pose
Outfit #2 For the gym. Who said you couldn't celebrate the season while lifting weights?

Outfit #3. This is called a classic Christmas outfit - boring but hey, sometimes you just run out okay?

Outfit #4 Notice the Christmas-y earrings.
Outfit #5: Red coats are always a nice accessory at Christmas time.
Outfit #6. Just a note: half these clothes were purchased at Provo's very own Desert Industries. And may I note that Shanna herself (the one pictured here with her adorable baby!) is the very inspiration for these festivities.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!! May your season be full of less work in a boring office with dangling paper gingerbread men and more time spent with family. Love you all.

(Please excuse the corny-ness of this post...I've been stuck in an office all day by myself, okay!?)

December 15, 2010

My walk to campus today:
I woke up to a blanket of snow. Love that feeling. Yesterday I officially finished my finals. It felt so so good to wake up at 10 am today (I've been sleep-deprived the past few days), make a breakfast of smoothies and Taiwanese egg pancakes, go weight-lifting, sing Christmas carols insanely loud and off-key with my friend Maranda, and then get to walk through a winter wonderland to work. What a morning.

Recently, I've been feeling grateful for tender mercies and all the little things I

about life. Here are just a few things:
1. Snow
2. Being done with finals, and getting good grades on them
3. hip-hop music
4. A clean kitchen
5. Running
6. Roommates that inspire me to have dreams, and help me believe that Heavenly Father will help me achieve them (Kasia)
7. Personality

8. Wearing skirts for fun
9. a good laugh
10. Roommates that listen. Really well (Ronnie)
11. Repentance & forgiveness
12. Chinese and anything Asian
13. Babies
14. Agency
15. my amazing parents
16. holiday cheer (Shanna Christensen)
17. Scriptures
18. Technology! (new.lds.org)
19. Service
20. Christmas

Best roommates ever

This is a tribute to my awesome roommates. They are soooooo fun. And spiritual.

Every night, we gather together for apartment prayer after which we all go around and say:
#1. BPOYD (Best Part of Your Day)
#2. What you did for someone that day.

It's changed my perspective and helped me to try and focus on service every day.

I am so blessed.

Thanksgiving

I spent Thanksgiving in Moab with Angie-poo and Bri-bread. It was so fun. I got spend some of Angela's last moments as a pregnant woman with her. Love. Them.

talk about terrible

I know that most of you check my blog regularly to see if I still look the same, but this post is going to have some substance other than pictures of me. So if that's not okay with you, you might want to skip this one. :)

I've been volunteering at the Utah State Mental Hospital this semester for my Abnormal Psych class. That class has opened my eyes to a lot of evil, a lot of sadness that I'm still unsure that I really wanted to know about. This world is a terrible place! Yesterday at my volunteering activity, I witnessed a crazy episode of insanity with a sweet little 10 year old. Something happened he had a fit of rage where he screamed at the top of his lungs every cuss word I've heard in the greatest density I've ever heard it - it was terrible. He then proceeded to pick up a table that was 4 times his size, throw it across the room, and start beating up another 10 year old girl sitting on the coach. Only after having all 4 limbs pinned to the ground by staff for 20 minutes (still screaming obscenities for the first 10 minutes) was he able to calm down. It was scary. But what's scarier is this kid's background - which is polluted by every kind of abuse you can think of. What a sad, sad life. My heart is broken for him. Life is so so so not fair. But I believe some day it will be, and that's something I just have to trust.

I've wondered about these kids - who are put in the mental hospital with 10 other kids with similar backgrounds. Does the mental hospital even help them? Does removing them from a family situation and putting them in a situation where they are one of 20 really help them? Do they actually have mental disorders or is their family just too messed up for them to live there? I wonder. Sometimes I think that I should help them, do social work - I've got the experience to get into a good program (an internship this past summer, volunteering, pre-reqs) but I'm starting to realize why people say it is incredibly emotionally-taxing. Could I really do that? Hear that? And try to help that? But if I don't, who will? Who's going to help them?

I want to really do good where good is needed.

Halloween Horrors

Me and Kasia and Nicole (roommates) on Halloween. I was a Chinese woman. Woot.
Us at a ward Halloween party. Aren't we so cool? Yeah!

Half Marathon (that I didn't end up running because I was sick) with friends Ben and Jenny. We are ninja turtles.

Roommate Fun

Ronnie, my new roommate, had a birthday. So we made her a cake. If you look closely, the candles are melting into the cake as we speak.

Dinner with friends and roommates!

Aspen Grove Hike 10-23-10

Hike in the Uintas 10-16-10

I love Fall. A couple of weeks ago, I went on a hike in the High Uintas with some friends (my roommate, Kasia, and her two friends Parker and Alex- who happens to be from NC as well). It was beautiful!

Life, Change, and Goals

Goodbye Fall...here comes my last Winter in Provo:

Just a few things I want to do in my life-

• Learn to play violin
  
• Become politically informed, active - Be a good citizen
• Backpack across China
• Pray like I did on the mission - recognize answers like I did on the mission
• Go to bed at 10:30 every night
• Teach my kids to love life
• Write a book
• Love like my grandparents
• Paint a huge picture/mural of Lehi's Tree of Life vision
• Frame pictures from my mission and hang them up in my house
• Have a baby or two or three or four or five or six or more
  
• Ride horses along the beach in Mexico
  
• Live in South America and re-learn Spanish
• Learn German
• Run a half-marathon in a foreign country
• Go camping atleast once a year
• Visit all the national parks
• Always do my visiting teaching
• Actually study Isaiah
  
• Go on a second mission to somewhere in South America/Asia
• Take a photography class by National Geographic photographers
• Buy a really fancy camera and document my life

A Breath of Fresh Air, Please

Right now I'm sitting here thinking:

Wishing I was out in M.N. (mother nature) starring at this:



Feeling a little frustrated about this:
There are days when I wish I could just give up. Give up on this whole Chinese-learning thing. It is seriously one of the hardest languages ever. You think you are relatively fluent, and then you open up a wikipedia article in Chinese, can't read anything, and just want to cry. It's a goal that I feel like I will never achieve - unattainable.

This morning I had a 5 minutes presentation on "The Opening up and Reform of China" (1978). It shouldn't have been entirely difficult, but I spent hours trying to find articles in Chinese and then hours trying to "decode" them. And then hours trying to organize it for class. And then I spent hours when I should've been sleeping, sitting in my bed, anxious as I'll get out for this presentation. I. want. to give. up.

On that note, I got chosen to represent BYU in a Chinese business competition with 2-3 other Chinese-speaking students. Strangely, I accepted (mostly because it's an honor and looks good on my resume). I regretted it last night as I tried to search through millions of websites in Chinese that I don't understand. The competition will be mid-November and we (the "team" of 4 of us) will be given a case, like Harvard Law school cases and then we will have to interpret, analyze, and organize those thoughts and present it in front of 4 sets of judges. Scary.

What am I doing?

My mind recalls Elder Uchtdorf's talk about simplifying our lives. Why do I get into this mode where I think I have to always be busy? Why do I peddle as fast as I can to where ever I'm going? Why is efficiency my top priority?

"Let’s be honest; it’s rather easy to be busy. We all can think up a list of tasks that will overwhelm our schedules. Some might even think that their self-worth depends on the length of their to-do list. They flood the open spaces in their time with lists of meetings and minutia—even during times of stress and fatigue. Because they unnecessarily complicate their lives, they often feel increased frustration, diminished joy, and too little sense of meaning in their lives."

Amen, Elder Uchtdorf. A.MEN.

He then goes on to outline 4 key relationships to focus on in our lives:
1. Relationship with God
2. Relationship with Family
3. Relationship with Fellowmen
4. Relationship with Self

Powerful.

the dirty dash

10k race in the mud and slush- 5 obstacles including hay bails, tubes to climb through, mud pools to swim through - 1 fun race

giving back

Today I had the opportunity to read Michelle Peet's fourth letter from the mission field. She is serving in Temple Square mission and has been there for a week. Something in her let struck me because it reflected the exact way I felt on my mission, and something I feel strongly about now. Here is an excerpt from her letter:

"Sis Vinokurova [her companion] is so incredible. Her eyes shine with a love for the gospel even though she's been through hard times. She has no parents yet she still has such hope. It makes me feel once again so guilty that I've been spoiled with such a family as I have. It made me decide more resolutely today than ever before that I want to raise my children in the gospel. In fact, I've experienced a big turning point in my life today as I'm coming to understand more and more why I've been so blessed. When I can't handle the fact that I've been given so much, I feel the only comfort I find is turning towards the future and planning to live a selfless life. It's time I start giving my all back to others. That's why I came on a mission. The work is about OTHERS. Not your own comfort. Not even your own feelings. But to help others overcome their troubles by coming to understand Christ, to invite them back to Him. The last 21 years of my life have been about MY development, my growth, and my testimony. Today marks the day that changes -- I plan to serve 18 months to help others with their problems, and when I come home, I plan on raising a family so my children don't have to be confused but can feel and know that their mother (and father) loves them."

Reading this letter, my eyes filled with tears and my heart with gratitude. This was one of the main motivating factors on the mission and continues to burn strong in my heart now - the opportunity and obligation to give back. I've been thinking about this and thought I'd share because it hit me so hard as I read her letter. It's harder now after the mission because everything is about me. I hope and pray that opportunities will arise and I will be guided to find ways to give back.

Bump

A bump in the road. This is what I have been experiencing lately. Or atleast that's what Grandpa Hatch calls it. I think I would rather call it something like "lame." But that's just me. Kevin and I broke up. If you want to know more about, maybe someday I will tell you. But for now let's just say it's been the most emotionally taxing couple weeks of my life. Even though I really really cared about him, I know it was right to break up. I have never felt so much peace at the end of a relationship.

That said, I officially have no friends. I am not depressed about it. It's just another small bump after that last one. Making new friends, I've realized, is actually really difficult sometimes. It will take time.

I started this whole "making new friends" kick with a movie night...by myself. As well as hanging out in the library...by myself. And eating ice cream...by myself. Notice a trend?

I saw some sweet flowers by the temple today that just brightened my day.



The scriptures also continue to be my most honest critic and sure guide through all of this. A few days ago I came across this scripture that helped me realize that I have a choice:

"...because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility" [Alma 62:41]

No matter the size or difficulty of the bump, we have a choice. And being humble is easier in the long run.

The Grand Tetons: The Grand Vaca, Baby

10 Ingredients to an awesome vaca in Grand Teton National Park:
1. Stopping in Afton, WY to see the largest arch made of antlers (it's only competitor probably Jackson Hole, WY)
2. Biking to Jenny Lake in WY
3. Being enveloped by wild flowers every corner
4. Stretching aspens
5. Hiking with attractive male
6. Wading across rivers in water shoes and ultra-classic Neoprene booties
7. Hiking up Table Mountain to see a beautiful view
8. Pregnant sisters
9. Planned "relaxation time" (watercolor and guitar!) with coolest ranger couple ever, who just happen to be related to me
10. Pancake breakfast


SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNNNN!